Anger is a mood and we can control it, we can decide how much of our life will take place. We can see the underlying causes of the feelings of anger we feel and we can act to produce solutions. So, how do we control anger and improve our lives?
As a team of high heels we prepared a compilation from the book titled "The End of Dependence in Relations" by the author named "Melody Beattle" We hope that these proposals we see useful will make your life more beautiful.
Feel emotion: Even if the feeling you feel is anger, it is only an emotional energy after all. It is not right or wrong; do not have to be judged. There is no need to base your anger on justifiable grounds or to have an excuse. If that's the anger of emotional energy, you feel it. Feel the feelings of fear, guilt, regret, inadequacy, frailty that are under the anger.
Understand the thought: Understand the thoughts accompanying your feelings of anger and be aware of it. Just like when you enter a room, if you open the lamp to see it better and light it up and look around in the light, light your thoughts and examine them in the light, look with objective eyes. See if your ideas are stereotyped and repetitive. So you get a lot of information about yourself and your location.
Decide: Are you a person who is angry with you or are you angry with yourself? Do you feel anger because of some unfulfilled requests? Are you angered by the changes that you can not do yourself? The fastest and most effective way to control anger is to give up shouting at the person or situation that angered you and bringing a clear picture of what you want. If you are angry about a situation related to yourself; talk to yourself, listen to your inner voice.
Check: Do not let your ancients control you. If you will allow your anger to control you, to seize you; you can say something you can regret later, and once again you can regret it. Be aware of every moment, every sensation. There may be those who say to you, "Understand every situation and man, do not be angry with anyone"; Do not believe this. Anger is a human emotion and it must be, but you should not let it get you.
Be honest: When you start to get angry and fight, take a deep breath and move away from the person you are fighting with. Go to another room by saying "I do not want to talk shuan", take a hot shower, do something else that will keep your mind busy and wait until you calm down. You do not have to respond to him angrily because someone is talking angry with you, you do not have to hurry to answer. Be honest with yourself and the other side; Share your real thoughts and wait for it to calm down.
Take responsibility: If you are the one who started the debate about the anger, take the responsibility of your feelings. Instead of saying "you are driving me crazy" to the other side, prefer to say "I feel angry when you do this, please do not repeat". Of course you have to communicate with people, always try to use the right words, you have to work hard. Give yourself time and be patient to find out.
We mentioned at the beginning of our writing that your anger is an emotional energy: to destroy the angry emotional energy, you have to deal with good things for both spiritual and quality of life. Clean the kitchen, dance, clean the garden, iron, cook, bathe in hot water, walk outdoors. According to your pleasures, do the activities that will help you to dispose of this anger energy over.
Type the letter: Write letters describing your feelings and thoughts you will not send to anyone; is one of the most effective methods of anger control. "If I were to be able to feel anger for something, and if nobody would know it, and if I had not felt this way, it would be what I was going to get angry at:" Yes, you can throw anger out of the paper and get rid of guilt.
Anger control training: Take a notebook and a pencil to your ancestor to control and feel your anger. When you feel angry during the day, write in your notebook and find out the underlying cause of your anger. What makes you angry? Is it your partner's irresponsible behavior, your co-workers' selfishness, or your own failure to work out your dreams? Find the cause under the anger and think about what you can do to create a solution for it.